Greatest Love of All

I’ll admit that I can be a bit too hard on myself at times. Most of the time I am always thinking on the positive side of things. Keeping in mind that your thoughts can become things. I think it’s better to always have a positive mindset in order to have a positive life.

But I AM a human being and full of ego and emotions. As much as I try to not live an ego based life, it is something I cannot avoid. This is the type of world we live in where wondering if I’ll ever be good enough, pretty enough, smart enough and worthy of the good things in life. Even though in my heart I know I am all of those things and more. Sometimes I cannot help it and I nitpick about every little detail about myself. Why do I do this to myself? Why do I even allow it to happen? It’s not right and it’s NOT okay.

To quote one of my favourite celebrities is Ru Paul, a famous male actor, singer, tv personality who is known for dressing up as a drag Queen. He was the first Drag Queen to be a spokesperson and land a campaign for a major cosmetic company. Basically he paved the way for being different. It’s okay to be different. In fact it’s better to be different. Learning to be perfectly imperfect and owning it. “If you can’t love yourself. How in the hell you gonna love somebody else?” I love that quote! Because it’s true. It’s probably easier to love others than yourself. Why is like that? Why is is so hard to love yourself? Why are we so hard on ourselves?

I have good days and I have bad days. I have great days and I have horrible days. I have the most amazing days and I have the worst days. Like I said, I am usually more on the positive side of things. I’m usually always happy for no reason but loving life. But once in a blue moon I have days where I am sad. Some days I question what I’m doing in my life. I question why I’m not where I want to be in life. I question what is wrong with me. That is when I have to stop whatever I’m doing and take a slow deep breath. Nothing is wrong with me. I’m perfect just the way I am. I am worthy for all life’s greatest treasures. I deserve the best in life. I remind myself that I AM enough.

There are days where it feels like a dark cloud tries to take over me. It’s on those days where I turn to meditation , yoga, exercise, running, deep breathing, singing my heart out, dancing like nobody is watching. I feel better when I move. There’s something about moving the body that makes me feel like I’m moving negative stagnant energy out. I also find when I’m feeling those negative emotions, it’s better to be around people who will make me laugh or brighten my day. Even spending time with family or friends who are like family makes my heart so happy and full.

For the times when I’m really at my wits end and feel like I want to scream…sometimes I do! I’ll drive with the windows open and just yell at the top of my lungs. It feels f**king fantastic. Something about having the cold wind briskly blowing on my face while yelling is like going on a rollercoaster. It’s an instant therapy relief session. When I can get outdoors and weather permitting I like to take off my shoes and walk on the grass, in the water or on the sand and get my feet connected to nature. There’s so many nerves in the feet reflecting to different parts in the body. It’s always amazing what can happen when you let your feet just be free to breathe. It feels like the whole body breathes. From the muscles, bones, nerves, blood, organs and all the systems just through the feet.

Lastly writing in a journal automatically cures my negative thoughts and feelings. By the time I finish writing my last words, I feel like the weight has been lifted off my shoulders. The darkness has left my body and I feel only love and light. Journaling is one of my favourite ways to express how I’m feeling and change my negative attitude to appreciative gratitude. Thank You for taking the take to read my thoughts. By me sharing my thoughts with you helps me release bottled up feelings. It’s okay to be emotional. It’s even better to work through the emotions to a happier place. Happy thoughts create happy things. If you haven’t figured it out by now…that the greatest love of all should be loving yourself first and foremost. Make everyday the best day whether you can believe it or not. Fake it until you make it.

“If you have good thoughts, they will shine out of your dave like the sunbeams and you will always look lovely.” ~Roald Dahl